Friday, August 26, 2016

28 Days of Gratitude - Day 5

Today I am grateful for money in the bank so that we can afford the week's expenses.
I am grateful for quiet mornings at work so that I have a chance to wake up in peace.
I am grateful for Charli for being concerned about me.
I am grateful for a dishwasher to make cleaning the dishes easier.
I am grateful for hot water because showers are much nicer warm.
I am grateful for my sense of humor because it keeps me amused.
I am grateful for my glasses because I can't see well without them.
I am grateful for the beauty school for making it so I can get a nice hair cut cheaply.
I am grateful for sleep because it recharges me for another day.
I am grateful for my imagination because it keeps me entertained for hours.

Thursday, August 25, 2016

28 Days of Gratitude - Day 4

Today I am grateful for headlights so I can see to drive to work.
I am grateful for honest people because they inspire me.
I am grateful for being able to refill prescriptions online because it saves me from making a phone call.
I am grateful for sweet notes from teachers because I love to hear that they love my kids.
I am grateful for fans because they keep me cool.
I am grateful for my nose because somet things smell so good.
I am grateful for the mailman because just going to the end of my driveway to check the mail is very convenient.
I am grateful for nice, ripe tomatoes because tomato sandwiches will always be my favorite.
I am grateful for Bill's job because it has been a steady source of income for years.
I am grateful for healthy children because so many people deal with struggles I can't imagine.

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

28 Days of Gratitude - Day 3

Today I am grateful for my phone for keeping me occupied when I'm bored.
I am grateful for money so that I can pay my bills.
I am grateful for my coworkers who help make my job smoother.
I am grateful for dragonflies because they are my spirit animal.
I am grateful for coffee because it gets me going in the morning.
I am grateful for the school nurse for taking care of my kids.
I am grateful for my brother-in-law for helping out with my kids.
I am grateful for routines because I feel better when I have one.
I am grateful for my eyes because I like seeing beautiful things.
I am grateful for music because it makes me feel more deeply.

Thank you, Bill, for being a good father.
Thank you, Bill, for working so hard to provide for the family.
Thank you, Bill, for your sense of humor.
Thank you, Bill, for mowing the lawn.
Thank you, Bill, for sticking around.

Thank you, Momma, for giving me life.
Thank you, Momma, for caring for my friends growing up.
Thank you, Momma, for being a good example of work ethic.
Thank you, Momma, for standing up for me against your own mother.
Thank you, Momma, for taking care of me when I was sick.

Thank you, Crystal, for being my friend in addition to being my sister.
Thank you, Crystal, for always being willing to help with my kids.
Thank you, Crystal, for taking care of Momma.
Thank you, Crytsal, for your quilting talent.
Thank you, Crystal, for always encouraging me.

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

28 Days of Gratitude - Day 2

Today I am grateful for cranberry apple granola because it makes my tummy happy.
I am grateful for my therapist because I feel better after talking to her.
I am grateful for my feeling productive yesterday because I got a lot done.
I am grateful for health insurance because it helps me get better care.
I am grateful for dreams because they fascinate me.
I am grateful for cooler days because it's nicer than hot weather.
I am grateful for melatonin for helping me get to sleep.
I am grateful for another day to live.
I am grateful for scrubs because it makes getting ready for work so simple.
I am grateful for clocks so that I can know what time it is.

Monday, August 22, 2016

28 Days of Gratitude - Day 1

Today I am grateful for rainbow socks because they make me smile.
I am grateful for the snooze button because the time in between alarms is when the bed is the comfiest.
I am grateful for my job because I enjoy being able to pay my bills.
I am grateful for Tiny Alpacacino because he makes me smile.
I am grateful for my older sister because she inspires and encourages creativity.
I am grateful for my washing machine because it is so much more convenient than any alternatives.
I am grateful for my home because it shelters us and keeps us safe.
I am grateful for insulin because it keeps me healthy.
I am grateful for school because my children aren't home all day.
I am grateful for finger nail clippers because they keep me from having ragged nails and snagging everything.

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Summer blahs

Oh, summer.  Will we ever get along?  Probably not.

It's been a while.  At first it was because I was super busy.  Then it was because I was super blah.

My Random Balls of Happiness project kind of exploded for a minute, but has calmed down since.  I'm just letting it take its own course.  It's been really interesting to see the people I connect with on Instagram, and the other projects that are out there.  There's such a huge community of people trying to spread happiness and find and point out the beauty in the world.  It's amazing.

Even though my Happy Balls are kind of like therapy for me, and I've been feeling really good for a while, the clouds rolled in not too long ago.  I had hoped it was a PMS thing, and my therapist and psychiatrist think it could be hormonal, but I'm definitely struggling.  The psychiatrist is adjusting my medications and my therapist suggested that I keep track of my moods to see if it is related to my hormones in any way.  I really need more than 2 highlighters because I should have more than "happy" and "sad", but it's more like "good" and "bad" and I'm writing what's actually going on.  I HATE adjusting my Topamax dosage.  Good grief that stuff messes me up for a few days when I have to increase it.

The psychiatrist also gave me Lorazepam, which honestly scares the crap out of me because it's addictive.  It's prescribed to be taken as needed, and I've only taken it once since she prescribed it. I know people abuse the stuff, and I don't know how it makes people feel when they don't have anxiety/depression, but it just made me feel calm again and eventually I fell asleep.  Like I said, the stuff makes me nervous (ironic, an anti-anxiety medication making you anxious) because I don't want to be dependent on anything.  I've never even liked strong pain killers.  Plus, it's not often I have the luxury of being able to just knock myself out to cope with not being able to deal with life.  You know what I mean?  I have kids that need to be attended to, a job that I have to work.  It's not easy to schedule a nervous breakdown.  Trust me, I've been postponing mine for years now.

I'm actually having a good day so far.  It's not even 7am, but you know, I actually have a positive outlook on the day instead of feeling like finding the nearest cave and moving in.  Hopefully I can have a nice long yellow streak on the calendar.  PMS isn't supposed to hit for another week at any rate, anyway.

Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Black Jelly Bean

Saturday, Olivia went to spend the night with a friend, so we took advantage of the lack of pickiness and went to eat Chinese food.

Except Isabelle thought that meant we were going to the hibachi grill and was pouty.  I love Japanese food as much as the next guy, but it's expensive.  She got over it and ordered soup and was mildly disturbed by the "giant weeds" in it. LOL

After dinner, we took a walk at The Old Mill.  It was crowded with people trying to take pictures, which isn't unusual because it's a popular photography spot.  We dropped a few Random Balls of Happiness off.  There was a bride taking pictures and Isabelle tried to catch up with her to give her one of the balls, but didn't make it to her before she left.  Which, as it turns out was actually kind of serendipitous...

The ball Isabelle had was the gray ball at the top.  When we didn't make it back across the lake before the bride left, we found a tree and hung the ball.  I worried a bit about that ball because it was gray and a little dull.  It wasn't all bright and noticeable like most of my balls.  I worried that no one would find it.

Sunday, I got a message on Instagram from a lady asking me if she could buy some balls.  I didn't know her and she didn't mention knowing anyone in common, so I asked if she had found one of my balls.  She found the little gray ball at The Old Mill!  She's travelling to NY in a few weeks and wants to take some RBOH with her.

I'm pretty excited at how all of this is going.  I have lots of ideas brewing for it.


Monday, the girls ran into the house to tell me they had found a kitten.  

This is never-ending, you guys....  we have some stray magnet, and I need to dig it up and get rid of it.

I refused to even listen to them.  I was just shy of plugging my ears and "la la la" -ing

Finally I look.

It was the smallest, scrawniest black kitten I've ever seen.  Dirty and starving.  Dang it.

So we cleaned it up.  It was pathetic.  Scratched up, crusty, scabby.  Skin and bones.  Fed it some canned food.  Bundled it up and kept it warm.  I told the girls it had to go straight to the shelter, though.  

I called the shelter and they pretty much said it'd die there.  I know that making you feel like crap is part of the game because they don't want to take in any animals, but they did have a point.   The cat needed more care than they had time for.  So I felt too guilty and ended up taking it to the vet instead.

Black Jelly Bean is  about 5 weeks old.  Malnourished, but otherwise looks OK.  We're syringe feeding him for a few days until he starts eating on his own.  I still want to find another home for him, we really have way too many animals already.  But at least he has a chance now.  Just need to find another sucker... I mean softy.... like me.  =)


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