Sunday, June 16, 2013

Early in the morning

I decided that in order to avoid having a heat stroke at some point this summer, I'll have to get up super early on Sundays to run.  Waking up at 6am on the weekend is not my idea of fun, but neither is passing out somewhere along the Arkansas River miles away from any road.  

So, today, I managed to drag my booty out of the bed at 6:05 am (I hit snooze, but just once).  I debated whether or not to eat something first... and knowing that we were in need of groceries and my choices were toast or toast... I made the terrible decision to just wait until after my run.

While I was getting dressed, I started making myself really paranoid about going out to run so early.  I don't know why I felt like it would be more dangerous than running any other time of day, since it was daylight already, but I felt like I'd be out there all alone on the trail.  Except for the maniac serial killers, of course.

But I went anyway.  Because screw serial killers.

There were probably more people out that early than I usually see later in the day.  And I discovered that's when the fit shirtless guys (vs the not-so-easy-on-the-eyes shirtless guys) run.  So, if I were to pass out or have some hobo accost me, I had lots of muscle to rescue me.

I started off, and my legs just felt really heavy.  I couldn't find my rhythm.  After a mile, I decided I would walk a quarter mile, then run a mile, and so on like that.  After my second mile run, I got some water and was at the Big Dam Bridge and was glad that it was a walking section because I am not ready for a quarter mile of uphill.  I thought running back down would be easy, but running down the bridge is very jarring to the body, and I decided to walk back down.  I drank some water and took off running again, but just wasn't feeling it.  My lower back was hurting and I felt just icky.

I probably should have eaten.  And I think my body is fighting off something.  I walked the rest of the way back, and towards the end, even that was difficult.  

The temperature was really great though... not hot at all.  And it rained a little on me, which was nice.  It wasn't hard rain, just sprinkles.

I picked up some donuts for the girls on the way home and ate, then while they ate and watched TV, I laid down on the bed and dozed off for a while.  I felt just awful.  Achy, my head hurt, totally wiped out.  

After I got up, made coffee and took some Advil, I felt fine.  

Part of me is disappointed I didn't run my entire 4.5 miles today, or even half of it.  But part of me is content to resign myself to the idea that maybe I won't be ready to run the entire half-marathon, and that's OK.  I'm going to keep my mileage for my Sunday runs the same and run what I can.  I'm sure some weeks will be awesome, and some will suck like today.  I just hope that by giving myself that inch that I won't take a mile and end up just walking the whole thing.  

I've just been struggling with running the past few weeks... I'm having a very hard time making myself run on the treadmill.  My head just isn't in the game lately and it's frustrating.  I know as long as I'm still doing something, it's good.  I think a big part of it is just that it's summer.  I'm not a summer person.  The heat just drains me, and I'm constantly having to remind myself that once I get this weight off, summer won't be so bad, so I have to just keep dragging myself along.  

Tomorrow I am taking the girls to a children's nutrition class offered by UAMS.  I'm curious to see how it goes and if having someone other than me tell the girls how important it is to eat healthy food has any impact.  My sister has a friend who has gone through their very intense weight loss program, and while I don't really agree with all the things his nutritionist tells him (like encouraging reduced fat products and things like that), I hope that there won't be many things they have to say that I'll be biting my tongue about.

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