Saturday, May 18, 2013

The cycle

I have been struggling quite a bit with my eating lately.  Trying to keep it real, you guys.  LOL

I generally don't enjoy cooking, which is a real pain when you're trying to eat clean or Paleo or Primal.  You just have to cook.  Add in the fact that every single time I hit some sort of milestone in my weight loss, I tend to just let go.  It never fails.  It's why my weight loss has taken as long as it has.  Yes, I've made a lot of progress, but 37 lbs in about a year isn't fast by any means.  Not that I'm trying to belittle my progress, I'm just saying that if I could stay on track consistently, it would be much higher.

When I am on track, I feel great.  Energetic and really motivated.  But when I slip, this vicious cycle begins.  I don't feel energetic or motivated, so I find reasons not too cook... then I don't have things prepared to take to lunch and I end up eating out... then I feel even more sluggish and unmotivated and don't want to cook dinner.  You get the picture, I'm sure.  

This past week was worse than ever, because not only did I not feel the energy or motivation to cook, I didn't have to worry about feeding my husband.  Making sure he has stuff in the fridge to eat when he gets home is usually what keeps me from falling off the wagon totally, even if it is by my fingernails.

And I have zero interest in food in general.  Yes, I get hungry, but there are few things I really want to eat.  Meal planning?  Torture.  Making a grocery list?  Well, I have to plan meals first.

Luckily, I've had my running to keep me from just spinning totally out of control.  I run 3 times a week, and I haven't strayed from that at all.  I'd like to do more on my non-run days, but as long as I have those days going for me, I feel like I've not totally given up.

I had hoped to hit 40 lbs lost by my 5k next Sunday, but that's most likely not possible at this point.  It was totally possible when I hit 37 lbs lost, but then I bounced off that pretty hard, as I always do.


I'm really going to make the effort this week to get back on track.  I planned out meals for the week and went grocery shopping.  I have stuff for my lunches.  We do have a date night on Monday (what?  how'd that happen?) but I have already put in my request to eat somewhere I know I can enjoy eating healthy at.  I'm going to make sure I'm tracking my calories.  I may not be 227 at my 5k in a week, but I should feel much, much better.

Time to hit the upswing of the cycle.  And really concentrate on staying away from the down side for a while.

So, anyway...

It's my last week before my 5k!  Eek!  I'm going to see if watching something while running on the treadmill makes the time pass quickly.  Netflix on my phone, so you know, I won't be able to see crap.  LOL  I'm getting bored with my music playlist and wanted to try something different.  Tomorrow I'm aiming for 2.75 miles outside... my last outside run before the 5k.  Then 3 miles on Tuesday and a trial 5k on the treadmill Thursday.  It's gonna happen, folks!

Then it's 10k training.  Onward and upward.

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